Hello world, I am woman!
You might ask, why does this matter? I would love to think it doesn’t matter – being a woman. Has no effect on my day whatsoever. But that would be lies, darn lies! Not only is there PMS to contend with, but darn it all, there is still sexism out there.
"Ah, hellooo", you might be saying, "what did you expect?"
Well I expect more of people. The problem is, sexism, racism, classism, other related "isms" are not as obvious today (i.e. when is the last time you saw a "No Women Here" sign?) and because they are more subtle but still exist, I contend they are more dangerous. Bias is all around and everyone is in denial, so nothing changes. And it’s much harder to fight because it’s not overt.
A few examples:
– I had an argument with a man who is nice to men, crummy and condescending to women. Happens in every case I have witnessed with this particular man. Is it a trend or does it just happen to be that all these women he interacts with really suck more than men?
– I was in a meeting last week. Progressive company. 8 people in the room. I was the only woman. Oh wait, there was that woman who brought in more coffee…right. It’s 2006, remember that.
– Also in said meeting, a fellow meeting participant insisted on calling me Mrs. Sachs. In fact, I think at one point I was simply referred to as "The Mrs." (jokingly of course HA HAHA can’t you take a JOKE you sensitive WOMAN!). I turned my rings around self conciously, hiding the evidence, suppressing any thoughts they might have had that now I am to be taken less seriously ("Oh she won’t be around here much longer anyway – baby track you know"). Too bad the term "baby track" also has negative connotations. Children are our future, right?
– My husband has yet to asked what it’s like to settle in to married life. Me, I have been asked no less than 6 times. Settle in to married life? What? I am now a wife and my life is supposed to change? More on that in another post.
Let me be clear, I think women can be pretty horrible to one another – it’s not men that are at fault. I recently left a women’s networking group because the minute I asked "Hey, how can I get something out of this that helps my career?" I was treated like a hostile interloper. You could practically hear the whispers "GOD how selfish IS she??"
I don’t want to harp on this; bitching does no good. But I wanted to get it off my chest. It’s irritating that this crap exists.
All this makes me want to have a second glass of wine to grin and bare it. But I am not a drunkard. I have one glass and embrace the boobs. They are the outward and visble sign (ok, not SO visible but give me a break) that I am woman and darn it that is good. I can work, I can have kids, I can feed an infant (hope so anyway), I can bring home the bacon and cook it up in a pan. Be proud of the boobs! Welcome them into the board room. It’s about time.