I am suffering withdrawal. Not from wine, or chocolate or anything like that (maybe a little from martinis…gin martini, a little dirty, extra olives please…but given my pregnancy condition I now only smell when I am in their presence. Yum.) But no, not really those either. It’s worse. I am suffering withdrawal from…television. Oh lord, the horror. We are living in limbo now in a temporary apartment where we have no TV. To make matters worse, we also put our mail on hold and have been too lazy to go get it, so I am not even getting the junk mail and magazines I crave.
It’s a media fast and it sucks.
I would love to be one of those super intellectuals who does not need TV. I imagined myself all high and mighty (and annoying) where I would tell all my friends "Oh god no, I never watch crap like The Hills. I have no time for garbage like that. Now, what did you think of the recent Hitchens profile in the New Yorker?" But alas, I like pop culture and I miss it. I have no idea what is happening on Top Chef, I never know what to wear in the mornings because I don’t watch the weather, I am sure 24 or Grey’s is coming back soon but shit, I may have missed it already, I cannot tell you what is happening on Entourage, I barely saw any of the Open and the WORST of all is that I missed the Britney VMAs flop (btw, leave the girl alone about being fat – she had no business wearing that outfit but she is FAR from fat).
So I am reading. I like reading but I would be struck by lightning if I tried to suggest there are times it substitutes for good old fashioned channel surfing. I am cro-magnon after all. I so wanted to be a snooty no TV-needing adult.
There is one answer…the Internet! Lots of trash on the Internet. But of course, I never spend any time looking at trash or gossip on the Internet. Not me. Who has time for that?