My daughter called me MEAN tonight for the first time.  I am so proud!  This is a sure sign that she is growing up and gaining her sense of self.  Now EAT your lentils!!

Do you have regrets?  I have a few – probably worthy of their own post really.  But here are a few:

  • Should have taken a year off between high school and college.
  • I cannot believe I don't speak another language (does MSFT Excel count? I am fluent in that).
  • Should have run cross country in high school.
  • Should have stuck with rowing crew in college.
  • Should have listened to my parents when they said "Take piano!"
  • [are we catching a theme here, the coulda woulda theme?]
  • Should have played more as a kid and not worried about being embarrassed.
  • Sunscreen.
  • One can always see friends more and call family more than we do.
  • Laughing. More of that.
  • Should have coupled a minor in English with my Econ major.
  • There are hair and outfit regrets. I suppose they make for fun pictures now…don't judge.
  • This is a biggie – conflicted biggie – I regret taking my first job out of business school for the money and the name!  Oh there I said it!  I went to Goldman right after b-school and it was a mistake.  I did it because I thought I wanted to talk to hedge fund managers all day about diverse and alpha generating trading strategies!  YES.  That is what I told myself.  But in reality, it was for money, a "known" career path and well, some other dumb reasons.  I left after only a few months – got an offer at an internet start-up and ran.  The event was not terminal but something of a waste.  I pursued that job for nearly a year in b-school.  THAT was the waste.  What other time in your life do you have to experiment?  To try something new?  To look for a job that aligns with your passions?!?!  I had the world as my oyster and I went to…Wall Street.  Bad oyster.  Alas.  Now, if only we had a better way to figure out what we really WANT to do.  And what a luxury.  To have that as a choice. 

So there you have it.  Oh yeah, there are others, but oh how DULL.  I get the whole "I would not be who I AM! if I had done things differently" (I always picture people saying this, channeling their inner Scarlet O'hara.  But please. What a crock.  I mean sure, maybe that is true but really you would not do ANYTHING differently?  OK.  I suppose the way to think of regrets is as opportunities.  Who says I cannot take piano and learn a language now or in the future?  Think of it that way, feel better.   Move on.

I don't really know how my daughter calling me mean led to that diatribe.  I think I thought my parents were mean for trying to force me to do things I did not want to do but now wish I had done.  Now that is a tough balance to strike as a parent.  Think I will just deal with a few regrets tonight and get to my daughter's future therapy needs another day.